Black Domestic Goddess

All I can say is that the littleuns love summer camp. The first day was a blast. I got them there early, introduced them to their teacher and that was all she wrote. They ran away from mommie, who was still saying goodbye and joined the little people their age.

Now, admittedly, I was a bit sad that they just RAN AWAY like they couldn’t wait to get away ( but who could blame them - who wants to hang around with Mommy when there are scooters and bikes and hula hoops?) but, readers, buy the time I got out to the car and realized that it was just me for the next three hours, I was pumped.

So, you may ask, what was the first thing I did? I came home and flopped on the bed, closed my eyes and savored the silence. Blossom, (the new dog) seemed to really appreciate it too because she stayed in (my good living room) chair snoozing. No one bothered me, no one bothered her. There was no screaming, no “give it back” or the best, no MOMMY! S/he won’t leave me alone. QUIET, pure SILENCE.

I made a cup of tea, flipped open the laptop, turned on the TV and vegged out for the next 2.5 hours. (Oh yeah, I also called The ChatterBox Radio show - shout out to Christie!) I rediscovered blip.fm. Then I took a shower and picked them up.

And you know what? The difference in all of our attitudes was amazing. I was a lot more calm after having some time to myself in the morning. I wasn’t cranky, hungry (because I was feeding them and doing chores instead of eating) or angry because I wasn’t able to finish laundry or a cleaning task because I had to mediate a dispute.

And they were TIRED. What is it about being in or around the water that makes you totally exhausted? Whatever it is, I want to bottle it….:)

So, dear readers, the goddess is having a bit of a mini vacation this week - and I’m also glad that my children are having fun with little folks their own age!

If you don’t read the two previous posts, you’re going to be lost!

So, I drive to this center, which is in a sort of busy part of town. There’s a good diner down there though, so as we pull into the parking lot, Princess E says, “Mommy, are we going to get pancakes?” Ok, so I drive over to where I think the back door to the center is, and I assume that parents park in this lot and drop off here because the front door of the center faces a busy street.

I park. I look. No sign. Just a door with a bunch of 8 x 11 notices on it. I can’t read them since they’re about 10 feet away. I tell Mr. J and Princess E to stay in the car. I lock them in, then go up to the door.

Nothing is there that indicates “come around to the front, ring bell, nothing” And the door is locked.

Ok, so I get back into the van, drive around to the front of the center, which, as I said, is on a busy street. The FRONT of the center has no sign and the same notices taped to the inside of the door. No colored paper in the windows, no Big Bird, no Dora, no Grover, no Elmo, nothing. I can’t really see anything that indicates that this actually might be a day care center, not a deserted storefront. Plus I’m driving, so I don’t have that long to look. There is no place to park, so I keep on driving.

Back round the back again. I don’t have the number of the center, and to tell the truth, after having looked at the windows and other areas of the center, as well as the ugliness of the facade, I don’t want to be bothered. What happens when I don’t want to be bothered, I call hubby.

Me: I can’t even get into the center, I don’t see a sign.
Him: Did you go around the front?
Me: yeah, twice - looks like it’s deserted!
Him: Well, get out of there then.

As I’m talking, some dude comes strolling up with a key and opens the back door. Now, usually, I would have run up and said something, but I kept my goddess butt in the seat. After having perused the dirty windows of this place, plus the fact there was no sign, I was through!!!!

Me: Some guy just opened up the back door. He looked kinda strange, tho.
Him: Forget it then.
Me: (wailing) But what are we going to do about summer camp!!!! Waaaaaaah! Waaaah!
Him: You know, I think I saw a sign on XXXX road, over by XXX Church.
Me: (now excited) Oh, yeah! I”m gonna check it out! Yes!!

Long story short (my hands are getting tired), I check out the school where hubby saw the banner and it was NICE!!! There were children having FUN! There was a SIGN! A PLAYGROUND!

And mirabile dictu, the price was right! My money WAS good here. They appreciated my checkbook.

Saved, saved, saved!!!! The goddess is going to have a VACAY this summer!!!!!

So, to continue my quest for a summer camp, I called a few friends, got some information. The camp run by the city, which I like to call “ghetto camp” was definitely out. My husband was adamant about that, even though the 50 bucks a week was really tempting. However, if you read my previous post, you’d see why it was so durn cheap!

On to make the rounds of the day care centers. They must have some summer programs right? Only poor naive me, with the idealized vision that money would be able to purchase my children some entertainment this summer was sadly, sadly mistaken. Due to the number of people living in this town below a certain income line, they have established free preschool, of which many of the centers in this town are a part. (I know that last sentence was awkward, but I can’t abide an “of” at the end of a sentence.) Therefore every center I visited wanted to know if I had registered “downtown” with the school system. Now, even as a teacher, I tried to avoid “downtown” so why the heck would I even want to go there now? Bottom line? We’re paid by the government, honey, so take your stupid money and hit the road, Jack. Stop waving that checkbook around! We’re part of the big government machine now! And ya ain’t gonna getcha kid in here cuz you didn’t go DOWNTOWN!!!!!

Ok, fine…I tucked my checkbook back into my purse and got out of there. But wait! I received a tip from a friend to check out this particular daycare/summer camp. Not only was it private, it was Christian based. I thought I hit the jackpot! Not only was it recommended by someone I knew, it was private (which meant me and my checkbook were welcome) and it had a bit of morals thrown in.

So I do what the goddess RARELY does. I PICKED UP THE PHONE. I’d much rather look a website or have hubby call, but folks, I was desperate to get something firmed up and soon. Let me let you in on the conversation:

Center: Hello, Blank Learning Center, may I help you? (so far so good, right? Sometimes you call these places and folks just say, hello)
Me: May I speak to (Center director) please?
Center: May I AXE who’s calling? (Oh, lord, oh lord, please lady, don’t axe me…please, I’ve got three littleuns)
Me: This is First Name, Last name.
Center: Hold on please.

Now, I’m like, ok, ok, goddess, get over the axe, at least she answered the phone sort of professionally.
I’m on hold for about three min. Someone else picks up the phone and aks, I mean, asks me for whom I’m holding and I repeat. She then tells me that I can make an appointment with her, since she’s the intake person. Fine, no problem. Then, I aks, I mean ask her about the program.

“Oh, we do, blah, blah and enrichment. Sometimes the children cry when they do enrichment because they don’t what to work.”

What the Sam Hill? Cry? What kind of children are these? Mookie gets a little annoyed when I try to put off his homework for even two minutes. So I talk myself down again, no biggie. relax, some children are just like that.

Now why would this woman tell me how lazy and unmotivated some of the children were? Do I want my children in a class of crying lazy sots? No, but hey, that’s life right? At least they were Christian based.

Next - the actual appointment.